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Marriage Advice: 4 Tips for a Successful Marriage 

Tips for a Successful Marriage 

Marriage can become very monotonous as we stay longer in it. It is easy to lose the spark and connection we shared in the beginning and fall into a routine of just keeping up. You may even start to feel like you are losing all the steam you had in the beginning for your partner. 

You see, having a happy and healthy marriage is possible. I won’t tell you this if I wasn’t a living example myself. Just before my husband and I got to this level of connection, we had our own issues and moments of disconnection.

Ours was shortly after we got married and I almost felt like quitting. The turning point began when we began to put these things, I’m about to show you into practice. It took time and a bit of edge sharpening here and there and look at the beauty we have become.

Before you give up on your marriage, read through and apply these 4 marriage tips that can make a big difference.

1. Spending Quality Time Together

Anything that would last for a long time would require we put in some intentional time into it.

As couples, it is important to spend quality time together if you are going to have a close relationship. The keyword here is quality. Quality indicates time where we are focused on actions that fuel our relationship and make each other feel prioritized. 

Time doesn’t have to be the whole 24hours, it could be as simple as checking in on each other while going about the days activities.

The common misconception is that when we say check-in, you are probably thinking of a long conversation or continuous texting.

A check-in does not have to be a long conversation. A quick “How’re you doing?” during break or “Thinking of you, is everything alright?” text message can go a long way.

If you know a specific project or challenge they are facing, show interest by asking how it’s going and if there’s anything they’ll need.

If you do not create time for your marriage, you will soon start to drift apart. 

2. Physical Touch

Touch every day even if you can’t have sex every day. Hugs, shoulder rubs, kisses, any form of touch. Touch releases dopamine, known as the feel-good hormone.

Touching each other releases dopamine which is also called the feel-good hormone  This simple action can improve your partner’s mood for the rest of the day.

Touching your partner does not have to be all sexual. Non-sexual touch can strengthen the bond between couples because it communicates affection, care and emotional support.

Imagine this – you’re in the living room watching a movie and your partner walks by, kisses you on your forehead and walks back to the room. Now tell me, did you just smile or not?

Now imagine if this wasn’t an imagination.

A simple high five, a back rub while watching TV or simply holding hands can be an incredible way to communicate the level of intimacy you feel with your partner. This simple tip will make a huge positive difference in your marriage. 

3. Praying Together

Prayer is speaking to God and can be done anywhere; in the car, on the job. Speak to God every day to help you love yourself and give your spouse love.

I have said it before – Couples who pray together, stay stronger together.

Here’s how prayer works in your marriage. When you pray, you are expressing your vulnerabilities and anxieties to God. You admit and acknowledge that he’s the only means to overcoming the challenges you face.

When you pray together with your partner, you are both laying doing your vulnerabilities before God, together. This is the foundation that strengthens your love.

You see, you cannot love someone if you do not love yourself. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Take time to pray for God’s love to radiate to you and through you, so you can in return, love your partner as they should.

In addition, praying for your spouse can help you build empathy and compassion. As you pray for their wellbeing, you present their challenges before God and what you’d like to see different in their lives. Those emotions you find difficult to express verbally can be poured out while praying.

Prayers do not have to be lengthy or complicated. A few heartfelt words expressed in the car, during a walk or before bed can be incredibly meaningful and helpful for your marriage

4. Forgiveness

Minor offences will always happen in marriage. You might step on each other toes or say a careless word that hurts. Forgive minor offences as many times in a day.

Minor offences are inevitable in every marriage. If you are solving puzzle pieces, you would realise that occasionally you bump pieces together but that doesn’t stop you from fixing them.

The key to a happy and healthy marriage is building an attitude of forgiveness where you can move past the little issues.

Now, forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to condone your partner’s negative behaviours or pretend issues do not exist. Instead, rather than allowing resentment to set in, you choose to release whatever resentment you feel and move forward.

Holding on to anger or resentment hurts you more than your spouse. Do you ever feel your chest get heavy with emotions?

Acknowledge that you feel hurt and communicate this to your partner without blame. Allow them to explain their actions and apologize. Make a conscious effort to forgive your spouse.

Forgiveness is not a one-time act. As long as two people interact, there will always be minor offences. So forgiveness is continuous

Conclusion

Your marriage is a journey to perfection. Like Rome wasn’t built in a day, it will take time to build on your ideal marriage. What matters is the effort you put in daily to make your relationship work.

If you take each of these points and dedicate time to apply them consciously in your marriage, you will definitely notice the changes over time.

As a marriage counselor, I have helped couples get back on track like they just met through my 30-day Couples Reconnecting Challenge. Almost a thousand couples have been on this challenge and have shared positive transformations in their marriage. 

Are you ready to join the July 30-Day Couples Reconnecting Challenge? Click this link to get started.

Picture of Ruth Esumeh

Ruth Esumeh

Ruth Esumeh is the founder of Ruth’s Marriage, a marriage counseling and relationship coaching company. She is a Certified Marriage Counselor and Therapist helping couples enjoy marriage, God’s way! Follow Ruth on all social media platforms.

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Confidentiality Policy

1. Introduction

At Ruth’s Marriage, we are committed to providing a safe and confidential environment for our clients. This confidentiality policy outlines how we handle your personal information and the limits to confidentiality that may apply during the course of marriage counseling sessions.

2. Confidentiality Assurance

2.1 Client-Counselor Privilege: All information shared during marriage counseling sessions is confidential. This means that your counselor will not disclose any information without your explicit written consent, except as required by law or ethical standards (see section 3).

2.3 Protection of Records: Client records, including session notes, assessments, and any other documentation, will be securely stored and only accessible to authorized personnel as outlined in section 4.

3. Limits to Confidentiality

3.1 Domestic Abuse or Physical Abuse: If there is reasonable report of
physical abuse, we are legally obligated to inform the victim to report this to the appropriate authorities.

3.2 Threats of Harm: If you pose a serious threat of harm to yourself or others, we may need to take steps to ensure safety, which may include disclosing relevant information to appropriate parties, such as law enforcement or medical professionals.

3.3 Court Orders: If a court orders the release of your counseling records, we may be required to comply with such an order.

3.4 Supervision and Consultation: Your counselor may consult with other mental health professionals for supervision and training purposes. In such cases, your identity will be kept confidential.

4. Access to Client Information

4.1 Authorized Personnel: Only authorized personnel, including your
counselor, and administrative staff, of Ruth’s Marriage will have access
to your information.

4.2 Security Measures: We take all reasonable measures to protect your
personal information, both in paper and electronic formats, from unauthorized access, disclosure, or alteration.

5. Client Consent

Before any disclosure beyond the limits outlined in this policy is made, we will seek your explicit written consent, explaining the purpose and recipients of the information to be disclosed.

6. Record Retention

Client records will be retained for a period determined by applicable laws and ethical standards. After the retention period expires, records will be securely destroyed.

7. Questions and Concerns

If you have any questions or concerns about our confidentiality policy, please feel free to discuss them with your counselor or write us at ruthsmarriage:gmail.com

8. Policy Updates

We may update this confidentiality policy from time to time to reflect changes in laws, regulations, or our counseling practices. You will be notified of any significant changes.

Cancellation Policy

$50 fee (converted to your currency rate at the point of payment)
CANCELLATIONS AND MISSED APPOINTMENTS

The client is expected to arrive on time for each booked session. A cancelled or postponed appointment slows down our work and might have a negative influence on other clients. Because your appointments include the reserve of time expressly for you, and out of mutual respect for each other and our other clients, postponing or cancelling an appointment requires a minimum of 24 hours’ notice in advance.

WHEN THE NO-SHOW/LATE CANCEL FEE IS WAIVED

This means if your appointment is supposed to be 9am on Wednesday and you wish to cancel, we expect to have received your email by 9am on Tuesday, then we can waive the cancellation fee. If we receive your cancellation later than that, then you will be charged the cancellation fee to have another appointment. Note that if your appointment is on a Monday, the cancellation needs to be provided no later than the prior Friday, by your appointment time, to be considered proper 24-hour notice.

If you can, we would appreciate more than 24-hour notice so that we can make that time available to other clients.

As a result, if you find out before the mandatory 24-hour notice that you will be unable to attend our session, please send an email so that we can fill your slot and place another client in your space who may require it. Counseling appointments are designated exclusively for our clients and are booked in advance. We are unable to cover this time slot by providing it to another client when a session is canceled without adequate notice. The email to send a cancellation notification to is ruthsmarriage@gmail.com

WHEN THE NO-SHOW/LATE CANCEL FEE IS WAIVED

This cancellation policy is only waived in the event of a serious sickness or emergency. Car accidents, family deaths, and severe illness are all examples of emergencies. In this case, if you are not physically able to cancel your appointment, you can get someone to write us an email on your behalf. Our cancellation policy applies even if the missed appointment was unintended. Work-related issues are not emergencies.

Late Cancellation Fees Process: Any session missed due to a cancellation less than 24 hours in advance will be assessed at $50/standard fee. You will be charged even if the cancellation was due to work or if you rescheduled the appointment without adequate notice. We will send you a payment link immediately to pay the cancellation fee before you can have another appointment or continue your sessions.

WAIT TIME GRACE PERIOD

Your wait time is kept to a minimum. Due to the length of time provided for each appointment, it is critical that you arrive on time for your appointments. If you are more than 10 minutes late to your appointment, we will have no choice but to reschedule your appointment and you will be responsible for the $50 fee of a no show. To avoid paying no show fees, we require at least twenty-four (24) hours’ notice for all cancellations (as described above). Both counselor and client have a grace period of 10 minutes.

RECURRING SESSIONS: CANCELLATION FEE PAYMENT ENFORCEMENT

For recurring therapy/counselling sessions, when you miss a session without adequate notice, you will pay the cancellation fee of $50 for that session, before another session. The same standard above applies for each session.

Ruth’s Marriage Counselling Services sends automated email reminders of forthcoming appointments as a courtesy. Whether or not you receive the text or email reminder, it is your sole duty to keep track of and attend any planned appointments/sessions on time. If your phone number or email address changes, please notify us via email.

We appreciate your understanding and our policy is hinged on the fact that a late cancel or no-show hurts at least three people: you, the counsellor, and another client who could have potentially utilized your time slot

THANK YOU

We value you and are committed to your journey, however, we can only accomplish this with your understanding of the obligations set forth in this policy. Time is of the essence in our practice and we encourage good use of time to accommodate more clients who need help. Thank you

Making a booking means you have accepted the terms guiding our Cancellation Policy.

I agree to the Confidentiality Policy and Cancellation Policy.