Being faithful and committed to our spouses includes taking steps to ensure that we are not swayed away by the temptations of another woman or man. It requires discipline, self-control and setting boundaries.
However, in today’s article, my focus is on the Men.
Studies reveal that up to 40% of married couples are affected by infidelity. Another study says “Men are more likely to have affairs than women and this could be linked to the submission that men express their love in a more physical way — they often don’t have the perfect “feeling words” for their wives. So sex is a major path to connection and intimacy for them which is why I encourage every man and his wife to read my book, Have Sex & Pray!
In this article, we’ll be exploring some practical tips to keep you from having an affair as a man.
7 Practical Tips to Keep You from Having an Affair as a Man
1. Talk About Your Wife
Start bragging about your wife. When you brag about your wife to a lady you are getting uncomfortable with, it sets your mind back home.
As a man, when you talk about your wife, you are actively flaunting her and reminding yourself of the value you have.
Constantly talk about how lovely your partner is, her hobbies, and how much you love her. If you’re in a position to have an affair, this conversation can immediately kill the mood.
2. Pray for Yourself and Your Wife
Prayer is such a powerful weapon that helps us subject our flesh. Pray in the spirit.
You pray about what you want and who you love. When you take time to pray for your wife, you’re solidifying the bond that you share with her.
Also, pray for yourself. As a man, you are naturally weak in the flesh. With prayers, you are building up moral strength to sustain your faithfulness.
Finally, as couples, pray together. Praying together as a couple helps improve and strengthen the intimacy you share.
3. Find a Hobby
Channel that emotion into something you enjoy doing alone. Watch a movie. Play a sport. Play a game. Work on a project.
A popular maxim goes, “An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.”
As a man, outside of your work schedule, what do you do with your free time?
As opposed to flirting and texting outside your relationship, you can channel that energy into doing something you love alone.
What hobbies pique your interest?
For example, it is not rare to see men hitting the gym or participating in an energy-tasking sport.
The key thing is to not be idle during your free time. Find something that gives you purpose and spend time doing it
4. Talk to a Happy Couple
Be accountable to someone. Speak to a happy couple friend that you can confide in. They will help you realize that a moment of pleasure will not make you satisfied, it’s only temporary. They can help you see the beauty in your marriage again.
If you’re having issues in your relationship and find it difficult to address it with your partner, the next solution isn’t to look for options outside your partner.
Find a happy couple that you trust and relate your concerns to them. A problem shared is half solved. Just talking to them will help you a great deal.
You can also explore speaking to a counselor individually, I have seen men in my individual counseling sessions who are able to explore their feelings, thoughts and emotions and I am able to help them redirect it appropriately and provide helpful tools for them.
Affairs outside your relationship will only bring temporary pleasure. The effect on your relationship can be devastating for something temporary.
5. Don’t Go Out There!
Avoid places where you can be alone. Don’t go to that party when they invite you. If they’re in your office, for instance, don’t go having lunch together.
Fun fact – It is impossible to have an affair in the open.
There are places that, as a married man, you shouldn’t be found going to. These places create an environment that fosters behaviours that do not strengthen the bond in your relationship.
Rather than put yourself out there to be tempted, spend time with your partner. Go to an environment that allows for intimacy in your relationship. These include parks, resorts, churches and social events.
When you’re out with your partner, the tendency to have an affair will reduce drastically.
6. Nurture Safe Friendships
Adult men go through peer pressure too. If you want to keep yourself from an affair, stop keeping and hanging around friends who are not faithful to their spouses.
“Show me your friends and I’ll show you who you are.”
The company you keep has a great influence on how you behave. If you keep a circle that gloats about how they have options outside of their relationship, there is a high chance you’ll feel pressured to do the same.
Keep friends who challenge you to do what is right. Do not underestimate the influence of friendships. With faithful friends, you can draw insights on how to be faithful to your partner.
7. Work on Your Marriage
Most times, people get into an affair when their relationship is in a challenging phase. When you are being tempted by another woman, it’s the best time to work on your relationship.
It is normal for challenges to arise in your marriage. If you’re able to work it out, challenges can improve the quality of your bond with your partner.
However, when you start seeking comfort outside your partner, you are igniting the fire that can burn your marriage. Talk about your issues and find a resolution with your partner.
Effective communication is key here. If you’re finding it difficult to address the underlying issue, seek out professional help from a marriage counselor.
Wrapping Up
If you have found yourself in an affair, there’s always a second chance to make amends. You will have to win the trust of your partner back and these practical steps are a foundation to start with.
With counseling or marriage therapy, you can identify extra steps you need to take to remain faithful in your marriage. Start today and click this link to see how you can get help
